pending Derrick_Richmond [JametIndo]

[$taco0niel$]

Derrick_Richmond

---

 

 

     A man called Derrick Richmond was born in 1998. Derrick and his parents lived in ELS. His father was a lawyer and that’s why they had some money to spend. Derrick  was a person with a lot of ideas. He finished school with high grades and his parents were proud of him. When he became 22 years old his parents bought a nice apartment for him. He didn’t had a job and he still didn’t knew what he would do the rest of his life. Everyday he checked the newspaper for jobs. Then he saw an advertisement from a driving license company called LS-DL. It was one of the biggest driving license company’s around Los Santos. Derrick always wanted a big challenge and this was what he wanted. His idea was to build a license company which had everything. Driving, sailing, flying and weapons licenses. As soon as he could he wrote down all his ideas. The name, the building, cars, planes, boats and much more. He told his dad about his plans and his father started to believe in Derrick. He liked the plans and Derrick made his father proud. From this moment Derrick and his father started building the license company. They were asking information from every building which was available at the City Hall. And finally, they found a perfect building with a perfect parking lot in the centre of Los Santos. His father bought the building with his hard earned money. But his father told Derrick it was worth it.

     Ofcourse Derrick thought about a name already. LS-LC, the Los Santos License Company. His father became prouder and prouder. Derrick took care of everything. In 1915 was everything done. Derrick  was 27 years old and LS-LC was ready to start off. He made lots of advertisements and sooner or later he had some people. After some years he became second best license company. But afcourse he had the people of Los Santos more to offer. Sailing, flying and weapons license. After several years passed he became an famous and important man of Los Santos. In 1918 he met a beautiful girl called Jessica Hanson. She was 27 years old and she lived in San Fierro. After 2 years they decided to spent the rest of their lives together. They married in 1920. It was a huge and expensive wedding. Afcourse they thought about having a child and their first baby came in 1924. It was a boy and they gave their child the name Charles. They decided to stay with one baby because Derrick was also only child.

     In 1946 Charles Ramble was all grown up. He was 22 years old and he had just finished university. Charles Ramble studied laws because Derrick always wanted that Charles would become a successful lawyer like his dad. In 1947 Charles Grandpa died. He was 90 years old and dead because of an heartbreak. The funeral of Charles Grandpa was in Los Santos, he was berried there and Charles still visits that place everyday. 9 years later something awful happened. A civilian found Derrick died body infront of the LS-LC. He had a gunshot in his stomach and one in the head. The LSPD speaks about a robbery because his wallet was missing. But no one knows what happened that night on the 23rd of October. Derrick was also berried on the same graveyard as his father. Afcoure it was Charles duty to take care of LS-LC. Years has been past and Charles Ramble reached the age of 83. He is still the Director of the LS-LC but he isn’t the same active as he was 30 years ago. LS-LC also reached the name of the best license company of Los Santos.

 

 

---

 

Saya Jealous selaku pemilik account UCP JametIndo bersedia jika Character saya yang disebut di atas (Derrick_Richmond) dibanned permanent jika character story yang saya buat di atas berupa plagiat dari story milik orang lain.

[$taco0niel$]

Questions

Tujuan membuat character story:
supaya character saya memiliki cerita hidupnya sendiri

 

Account UCP yang saya miliki:
JametIndo

 

Account Forum yang saya miliki:
Jealous

 

Berapa lama saya sudah main di JGRP:
2 tahun lebih

 

Saya biasa main JGRP di:
Rumah dan warnet, tapi kebanyakan di warnet

[ferdhiikav]

Hi @Jealous, saya sudah mereview character story kamu dan saya masih menemukan beberapa syarat yang belum terpenuhi:

1. Buat jadi 3 paragraf dan porsi setiap paragraf harus imbang.

2. Atur kembali posisi hutuf gunakan rata kiri, kecuali awal paragraf diberi beberapa spasi agar terlihat dengan jelas.

[$taco0niel$]

Ok bang

[$taco0niel$]

14 minutes ago, ferdhiikav said:

Hi @Jealous, saya sudah mereview character story kamu dan saya masih menemukan beberapa syarat yang belum terpenuhi:

1. Buat jadi 3 paragraf dan porsi setiap paragraf harus imbang.

2. Atur kembali posisi hutuf gunakan rata kiri, kecuali awal paragraf diberi beberapa spasi agar terlihat dengan jelas.

sudah saya edit bang

[$taco0niel$]

32 minutes ago, ferdhiikav said:

Hi @Jealous, saya sudah mereview character story kamu dan saya masih menemukan beberapa syarat yang belum terpenuhi:

1. Buat jadi 3 paragraf dan porsi setiap paragraf harus imbang.

2. Atur kembali posisi hutuf gunakan rata kiri, kecuali awal paragraf diberi beberapa spasi agar terlihat dengan jelas.

udah di edit bang

 

[ferdhiikav]

---

To @Jealous

I am writing to you in regards of your recently submitted character story, we have reviewed your character story and, as a result, have come to the decision to APPROVE your request. Please read the following guide to activate your link your store to your In-Game account:

 

Sincerely,

@ferdhiikav
JG:RP Staff Team.